Eltermere Inn, Cumbria

Mr Oil persuaded Mr Vinegar to accompany him to the Lake District for a weekend of healthy walking about. By chance, Mr Vinegar discovered a good restaurant within walking distance.

MrV: That was stroke of luck, wasn’t it? Did you know there was a decent place to eat and drink so close to where we were staying?
MrO: No, I did not. Had I known, I would not have booked us a cottage in Elterwater. I thought it was remote. We were supposed to be getting fitter, not fatter.
MrV: But if we were walking during the day then surely we deserved something special in the evening.
MrO: Not if we are to improve our health. I had envisaged nourishing but non-fatty foods in the evenings, accompanied by one or perhaps two drinks.
MrV: That would never have worked. There is a pub in Elterwater, after all.
MrO: You deliberately subverted the theme of the weekend and you are clearly enjoying the situation. Why is it that you only ever display happiness when I am unhappy.
MrV: Do I? Tut tut. Anyway, my prawn and parmesan tagliatelle was quite wonderful. How was your carpaccio?
MrO: Under other circumstances I would have greatly enjoyed it but all I could think about was the carbohydrates in your pasta and the fat in the parmesan.
MrV: You were a bit glum about the main course, too, just telling the waitress “I’ll have what he’s having”. Mind you, it was an excellent surf and turf – delicious steak with prawns and scallops. It’s really a pretty decent restaurant.
MrO: Your admiration of it was very obvious. I can’t believe you even had a pudding.
MrV: A bit of ice cream, that’s all. What’s wrong with that?
MrO: It’s unhealthy, that’s what’s wrong. I don’t know why I bother.
MrV: Nor do I. Anyway, you can’t accuse me of going mad on the wine. All we had was a couple of bottles of that rather pleasant l’Aristocrate pinot noir from the Languedoc. Very reasonable, too, at less than £20 a bottle.
MrO: You drank most of it. And you appear to have forgotten the amaretto.
MrV: Ah yes, very tasty. Well I needed it to fortify myself for the walk back to the cottage.

Mr Oil and Mr Vinegar consumed two starters, two main courses, one pudding, two bottles of wine and a digestif, at a total cost of about £120.

Eltermere Inn
Elterwater
Ambleside
Cumbria
LA22 9HY

Tel: +44 1539 437 207
info@eltermere.co.uk
www.eltermere.co.uk